Your best career mentors might be closer than you think—like, sleeping next to you close.
With this article, we're combining love and work—or at least love and good advice on what to do in your career, what Power Moves you can and should make, and how your best strengths can be applied to any number of career pivots. Who is going to be a better well of knowledge on you than someone who has known you your whole life?
That's right. Sometimes, your best mentors are a phone call—or even a nudge—away. Here's why we think your loved ones can make some of your best mentors (and a few notes of caution when seeking professional advice from a loved one.)
Why Parents Are Great Mentors
Pros: Your parents, if you're lucky, are fountains of advice that is tailored to you. Why? They know how you react in high-pressure situations. They are familiar with your most inborn talents—maybe talents you haven't utilized in some time. These are the people who likely came to your every dance recital, who cheered at your every softball game (even if you were, in fact, sitting in the right outfield picking daisies), and who have seen you grow and learn from infancy.
Your parents can be great mentors because they see you at your best and your worst. They know how you react to stress, they know how to soothe you, and they ultimately want what is best for you.
Cons: Sometimes, parents simply love you too much. As such, they might have some specific blinders on when it comes to you.
Why Siblings Can Be Great Mentors
Pros: If it makes you shudder to seek advice from someone who used to give you wet willies on long car rides, you're not alone. However, siblings can be excellent mentors. Unlike a parent, siblings have less of a "buy-in" to your success. Additionally, a sibling is way less likely to offer you a loved-up version of any outcome—career or otherwise. Siblings are more likely to give you the "real deal" advice and the feedback you need.
Cons: Some siblings have toxic relationships that bleed into adulthood and never fully go away. While we are not psychologists here at Career Contessa, you can read more about toxic sibling relationships to see if you have one. A common theme, especially when seeking advice from an older sibling, is their inability to see you as anything but "the younger sibling" or "the baby."
Why Your Significant Other Can Be a Great Mentor
Pros: If you're a person who brings your work home (don't we all, at least a little?) then your significant other is pretty familiar with the inner workings of your workplace, the work you do, and the career trajectory you're aiming for. In fact, your significant other probably has a better view of your career goals than your boss, but that's a whole article for another date.
Cons: Your significant other should have a vested interest in you and your success, no matter what it looks like. However, sadly, sometimes that isn't the case. When faced with decisions that could involve big moves (literally and/or figuratively) have a good think before bringing to your significant other. Sometimes, it's difficult to play the impartial mentor role when you have huge stakes in the final decision.
Why In-Laws Can Be Great Mentors (Seriously)
Pros: This very unexpected source of mentorship comes from our Content Director, Caileen Kehayas Holden. She describes her brother-in-law (by way of marriage to her older sister) as a great mentor. Holden says, "Whenever I am going through a career transition, he is a great sounding board. Not only does he give me great advice, but he always seems invested in whatever I'm experiencing. Since he works at a large company, he is able to see things at a macro- and a micro- level, which is really helpful in moving through any career."
Cons: So, this one comes with a caveat. In-laws can be tough, but if you have a great relationship, seek out the advice. If you have a contentious relationship with your father-in-law, for example, maybe don't seek advice from him.
Why Best Friends Are Great Mentors
Pros: Your best friends act as your rah-rah mentors. They are the kind of mentors who will amp you up, tell you how amazing you are, and recount dozens of stories about your resilience in the face of both bad bosses and bad dates.
Sometimes you need a mentor who is going to champion you—who is going to be honest but kind. Your best friend knows a lot about you, your career, your love life, your family life, and more. Nobody else is going to have a 360-degree view of the full you quit like your best friend.
Go to your best friend when you're facing unique challenges that might affect your career and home life. They will have great ideas on how to make a balanced decision (without having any real stake in it.)
Cons: Your friends often have your best intention at heart. As your "rah-rah" mentors, they are here to make you feel better and feel whole. Like the cons of having parental mentors, best friends can be a little too in your corner at times. However, you can always request that your BFF "keeps it real" and gives you tougher advice.
